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church_lge.jpg

church weddings

The traditional way to be married is in a church service. Most couples get married in the church for religious reasons. At least one partner, but usually both, are expected to follow the beliefs of the church.

Photo: Turning Heads Photography

 

  The church leader will be interested in your marriage from a religious perspective, as their church is a place of worship. Most church leaders advise pre-marital counselling sessions and some will require you to complete questionnaires and surveys. It is important you both like and feel comfortable with the church leader as he or she plays a very important role in the wedding. They will organise aspects such as the organist and the choir, as well as the timing of the music, songs and bells.

Often you can select vows and sentiments that you have written yourself or that have special meaning for you as a couple. Discuss with your fiancée what you would like included in the ceremony such as readings, music, prayers and the content of your order of service booklet.  Some church leaders will also consent to marry you on a non-religious site such as in a garden.

Photo: GWP Studio
 
Which church?
If you regularly attend a church you may wish to get married in that church by your personal church leader. However, if you do not regularly attend, you will need to select a church in which to be married. Some points to consider may include:
  • Are there any fees for using the church, the organist or the choir?
  • Is there a fee if you’re not a regular member of the congregation?
  • Is the church leader happy to marry you as a couple? This can involve issues such as religious faith, divorcee and second marriages.
  • Are there special dress standards for couples marrying in a church?
  • Can you personalise the ceremony and to what degree?
  • Can children from previous marriages be included in the ceremony? Is it okay if the children are of a different faith?
  • Can the church be decorated as you would like?
  • Are photographers and videographers allowed inside the church? Are there any restrictions on them?
  • Will the church accommodate the physical needs of your ceremony? This may include considerations such as whether the aisles are wide enough for wheelchairs or prams; are the pews comfortable enough for elderly guests; is parking sufficient; is air-conditioning provided?
  • Is the church and the church leader available for a rehearsal prior to the wedding?

A traditional church wedding ceremony usually runs as follows. Remember, you can make your own variations to suit your personal taste.
  • Ushers arrive 40 minutes before the official ceremony starting time to greet and seat early arrivals.
  • The groom, best man and groomsmen arrive about 20 minutes before the starting time. They take the front row seats on the right hand side.
  • Guests arrive at least 15 minutes early and are shown to their seats by the ushers. The bride’s family and guests sit on the left, the groom’s on the right.
  • The organist/musician begins to play.

 

Photo: Icon Pictures
 
  • The bride’s mother arrives and is escorted to the front pew on the left-hand side. She leaves an aisle seat vacant next to her for the father of the bride.
  • The church leader enters, and the groom and his attendants rise and move forward to stand before the alter to the right of the aisle.
  • The bridesmaids can arrive 10 minutes before starting time, and wait outside the church for the bride to arrive. Usually the bridesmaids arrive with the bride.
  • When the bride arrives, the bridesmaids help her out of the car and into the church.
  • Often, the photographer and videographer will want to capture the bride arriving and entering the church so it can be wise for her to arrive a few minutes early.
  • As the bride approaches, a cue is given to the organist/musician to prepare for the wedding march.
  • The page boys, flower girls and bridesmaids queue at the entry for the bride and her father to enter and stop for a moment as the bride’s veil and train are adjusted. The bride is holding her father’s right arm. The attendants arrange themselves into position and the organist/musician starts the processional music.
  • The groom waits for his bride at the front of the church with the best man and other groomsmen on his right hand side.
  • The bridal procession moves slowly down the aisle. As they near the alter, the father leads his daughter to the groom’s left. By leaving her there, he ‘gives her away’ and takes his seat beside the bride’s mother.
  • The ceremony begins. At this stage, the best man holds the rings.
  • Before the rings are exchanged, the matron of honour or chief bridesmaid takes the bride’s bouquet and holds it until after the bride has signed the register.
  • The marriage vows are exchanged, and the newly married couple, their witnesses, and the minister sign the register.
  • The couple precede their attendants out of the church with the bride on the left of the groom.
  • As the couple leave the church, they are photographed with various combinations of family and friends and the wedding party.
  • After the photographs, the best man escorts the couple to the car that will take them to another location for more photographs or directly to the reception as arranged. He also ensures that all guests have transport to the reception.

 
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